I should have been asleep an hour ago.  I have to get up early tomorrow, and run the ten million errands I never have time to do on Mondays.  Mondays are classes, noon to 8.  No time for anything.  Did manage to get my GOCard replaced though, so I’m no longer a GU refugee.

I told my dad the other night (this is mostly what inspired the last post) that I was really targeting Seattle, at least West Coast, law schools for next year.  I was really excited when I told him, I know it was in my voice, and I thought he would be really excited too, because I’d be closer too home and I could see him (and my mom too) more often… but the response was really quite the opposite.

First, I was a little taken aback that he was surprised that I was going to law school.  Hmm… it’s been a priority for at least the last year or so, and the application process has consumed my life for the last 6 months.  But the Worst Part was definitely the fact that suddenly the approval and support that had been there all along seemed to suddenly have dissipated.  I was left on the other end of the phone, hurt and confused, while he berated my choice of life path by telling awful lawyer jokes about how it’s funny that Musharraf is shooting lawyers.

Well, first, the lawyers he’s ‘disappearing’ happen to be dedicated, passionate people risking their lives for the cause of an independent judiciary in an autocratic state, so they don’t sound so horrible to me…

And second… why is it ok to berate your child’s life choices? It’s not like I said, hey dad I want to be a mechanic!

I know, I know.  I’m 23, and sooner or later I have to learn to be proud of myself, and not need my reassurance to come from anywhere else but me (or Liz, or friends, I guess)- but deep inside I think there will always be this little girl who just wants her dad to be proud of her.

Luckily for me, though, I’m strong and confident and capable and independent… and I do believe in myself, and though it breaks my heart that my family isn’t behind me, I know that no matter what, I’m going to shine like gold in the air of summer~ just by the fire of my own will, just by my own ability to follow my heart where it leads me in this life.